COMMUNITY & LOCAL AFFAIRS CEY vs CFM: THE GREAT HELDERBERG GRUDGE MATCH —THE RIVALRY NOBODY OFFICIALLY ACKNOWLEDGES BUT ABSOLUTELY EVERYBODY IS HAVING Two towns. One basin. A shared mountain, a shared road and approximately forty years of accumulated opinions about each other’s parking, property values and general sense of self-importance. The Helderburger investigates. By Fannie…
NOMZAMO RESIDENTS EQUIPPED WITH APP TO REPORT PROBLEMS THAT HAVE EXISTED SINCE APPROXIMATELY 2009By Thandi Jacobs-Williams In a development described by the City of Cape Town as “digital empowerment” and by at least one resident as “so now it’s our job to report the potholes as well,” Nomzamo community members were this month trained to…
🍷 Swirl, Sniff & Surrender: A Deeply Unreliable Guide to Cape Winelands Tasting Notes A tour through the vineyards of Stellenbosch & Franschhoek — where the wine is magnificent and the label copy is completely unhinged Prologue You arrive in the Cape Winelands with the best of intentions. You want to appreciate wine. You want…
The Gordon’s Bay harbour wall once again filled before sunrise this weekend as local fishermen gathered armed with rods bait coffee flasks and deeply unsolicited opinions. Residents say the harbour wall remains one of the Helderberg’s oldest institutions where actual fishing occupies roughly 30% of the experience and the remaining 70% involves storytelling weather analysis…
In Memoriam • Gemeenskap • Laaste Bladsy FOURIE’S HARDWARE & GENERAL 1974 – 2025 Est. 1974 • Main Road, Somerset West • Closed March 2025 Survived by: one retired proprietor; three decades of loyal customers; approximately 4,000 items that cannot be found online; a hand-painted sign that nobody has the heart to take down; and…
MOTORING & PUBLIC SAFETY THE FAST LANE PHILOSOPHERS: AN INVESTIGATION INTO THE REMARKABLE INDIVIDUALS WHO BELIEVE 60KM/H IN THE OVERTAKING LANE IS BOTH LEGAL, REASONABLE and FRANKLY NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS Every day, on the N2 between Cape Town and Somerset West, a small but extraordinarily committed group of motorists takes up residence in the…
COMMUNITY By Vermin Hendricks The Gordon’s Bay Ghost Crime Prevention Group, which has long operated on the theory that crime — like most unpleasantness — can be discouraged through a sufficiently firm moral atmosphere, has bid farewell to its founding coordinator, Sgt Jereminah Naidoo-van Zyl, who has stepped down after guiding the campaign through its…
Educational experts across the Helderberg are encouraging parents to focus on creating “balanced high school experiences” for their teenagers rather than transforming every school year into a twelve-month Olympic qualification event with stationery. The advice comes as increasing numbers of local learners attempt to survive academics sport social pressure identity crises exam stress friendship drama…
Across the Helderberg basin a highly organised and quietly competitive subculture operates daily in plain sight. They do not wear uniforms of authority in the traditional sense. They do not attend municipal gala dinners. They do not give interviews unless absolutely necessary. Yet they arrive faster than most emergency services, identify distress within seconds and…
Somerset West developers have once again achieved the impossible by launching yet another “exclusive country lifestyle estate” strategically positioned between three traffic circles two construction sites and approximately 5 435 vehicles attempting to reach the N2 before sunset. The latest development promises residents “peaceful farm-style living in harmony with nature” despite being located directly adjacent…
