Estate Agent Describes 52m² Apartment as “Cosy Opportunity”
A property listing that appeared this week on a popular real estate platform has attracted attention for the linguistic ambition it brings to the task of making a 52-square-metre Strand apartment sound like something you would want to buy at the listed price.
The apartment is described as a “cosy opportunity,” which is the listing’s way of confirming it is small without confirming it is small. Its single east-facing window, which receives direct morning light for approximately ninety minutes before the building next door asserts itself, is characterised as offering “curated natural light,” which is accurate in the sense that the light is indeed limited to a specific and narrow window. The apartment’s location three blocks from the beach with a partial view, from the bathroom window if you stand at an angle, of a parking structure, is described as “steps from the shoreline with an inspiring urban outlook.”
“Open-plan living” refers to the fact that the kitchen and the sitting room are the same room and that this was not a design choice. “Ideal for a discerning buyer seeking charm and value” is understood in the area to mean that two of those three things are present and that the buyer may decide which. “Loads of potential” appears in the final paragraph and is used in its technical rather than literal sense.
The listing has received fourteen enquiries, which the estate agent describes as “excellent interest” and which reflects both the ongoing appeal of Strand’s position on the beach and the particular capacity of well-constructed listing copy to make a person want to see something before they’ve thought about it carefully.
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