After years of tourists fishermen joggers children and at least three overconfident uncles unexpectedly discovering gravity along the Gordon’s Bay harbour wall the municipality has finally announced plans to coat the entire structure with specialised anti-slip paint. The decision follows what officials carefully described as “an ongoing pattern of unplanned aquatic interaction” near the old…
Before WhatsApp groups became the preferred method for Strand residents to complain about barking dogs and before Somerset West residents discovered the phrase “curated lifestyle estate” there existed a mysterious tribe known as HAM radio operators. These brave souls spent their evenings in garages and spare bedrooms speaking into microphones hoping somebody in Finland would…
A six-year-old Helderberg boy was rushed to a local doctor this week after allegedly consuming several mothballs from a petrol station urinal believing they were “free peppermints for customers and Easter egg hunting going through his mind”. The shocking incident unfolded during a routine family fuel stop somewhere between Strand and Somerset West — an…
Veteran Bait Seller Gives Establishment Two Years, Generously GORDON’S BAY – The historic waterfront of Gordon’s Bay Harbour has reaffirmed its commitment to remaining “charming, authentic and slightly suspiciously expensive” following the grand opening of a boutique gin bar directly beside a long-standing bait shop. The development marks what local planners describe as “a harmonious…
Car described as “last seen on a Monday” recovers quietly in parking bay while owner gets lift, forgets and gets on with life for a fortnight “Ons Bring Die Nuus – Selfs As Die Nuus Reeds Twee Weke Oud Is” Helderberg vallei uitgawe | prys: R2.50 of een buskaartjie | landelike nonsens sedert 1912 BY…
