Car described as “last seen on a Monday” recovers quietly in parking bay while owner gets lift, forgets and gets on with life for a fortnight
“Ons Bring Die Nuus – Selfs As Die Nuus Reeds Twee Weke Oud Is”
Helderberg vallei uitgawe | prys: R2.50 of een buskaartjie | landelike nonsens sedert 1912
BY OUR MOTORING, MEMORY & WORKPLACE AFFAIRS CORRESPONDENT | HELDERBERG
A vehicle belonging to a local office worker, identified by colleagues only as “the silver one near the recycling bins”, has been successfully reunited with its owner after a fourteen-day unsupervised stay in a company parking lot, sources confirmed this week. The car, which had not been reported missing because its owner had, in the technical sense, simply forgotten it existed, was found to be in good health, mildly dusty and occupying the same bay it had always occupied with the quiet dignity of something that had absolutely nowhere else to be.
The sequence of events, reconstructed by this reporter with the aid of two eyewitnesses, one confused security guard and a parking register that no one reads, is as follows: the owner, a colleague we shall call “Kobus,” since that is apparently not his real name but everyone agrees it suits him, accepted a lift home from work one Friday afternoon. This in itself is not unusual. What followed, however, represents a masterclass in the human brain’s ability to simply file a thing under “sorted” and move on.
“I just never thought about it,” Kobus told this reporter. “I got the lift and then I got home and then — it was just gone from my mind. Like a PIN number you don’t need anymore.” He paused, then added: “I do still remember my PIN, to be clear.” This reporter did not ask about the PIN.
Colleagues describe the two-week period as “unremarkable in every way,” noting that Koos arrived at work daily, performed his duties, accepted lifts home and at no point gave any indication that something in his life was parked 40 metres away waiting for him. “He seemed perfectly normal,” said one officemate. “Which, in hindsight, is perhaps the most alarming part.”
“The car was fine. Better than fine, actually, it had not been stuck in traffic once.
In some ways, it had a better two weeks than I did.”
– Koos, Car Owner & Philosophical Thinker
The vehicle itself, a model this publication’s motoring correspondent describes as “definitely a car” was found with a thin layer of dust on the bonnet, one parking reminder flyer under the wiper (placed by the facilities manager on day eight, after which he also forgot about it) and a bird occupying what appears to have become a favoured perch on the passenger-side mirror. The bird was not available for comment but was observed to be in excellent spirits.
◆ Notice: Previously Missing ◆
One (1) motor vehicle, silver, four doors, tired expression.
Last seen: Monday morning, Bay 14, company parking area.
Found: Same spot. Two Fridays later. Completely fine.
The vehicle’s owner wishes to thank the parking lot for its patience, the facilities manager for the note and the bird for “not doing too much damage, all things considered.”
◆ Expert Reaction ◆
Prof. R. Swanepoel of the Department of Cognitive Sciences at an unnamed local university stated that “the human brain, when relieved of a task, will cheerfully delete the associated object from active memory within 48 to 72 hours.” He confirmed this is “completely normal” and that he himself once forgot a bicycle for eleven days.
A representative of the South African Road Traffic Act, asked whether any offence had been committed, replied: “Not technically, no.” The company’s HR department has added “remembering your vehicle” to the onboarding checklist, between “collect access card” and “locate the bathroom.”
The reunion, by all accounts, was low-key. Kobus walked to Bay 14 during his lunch break, unlocked the car, sat in it briefly in reflective silence and then drove it home that evening. He reports that it started first try and that the half-empty coffee cup in the cupholder had dried into “something that no longer resembles coffee but has achieved a kind of stability.” The cup remains.
Mark has since confirmed he will continue accepting occasional lifts home, but has implemented what he calls “a personal reminder system,” described simply as “I’ll try to think about it more.” The facilities manager has removed Bay 14 from the abandoned vehicle watchlist. The bird has not been formally evicted.
— ◆ —
This publication notes that fourteen days is, coincidentally, also the grace period on most municipal parking fines. We draw no conclusions from this. Kobus asks that his real name not be used, a request this publication has honoured in the technical sense.
Die Heldeburger aanvaar geen verantwoordelikheid vir vergete voertuie, versteurde voëls, of stabiliseerde koffiebekers nie. Indien u eie motor vermis is, kyk asseblief eers by die werk. © Die Heldeburger 2026 — Gedruk met groot simpatie vir Kobus en sy kar.